"That's not fair!"
How often have you heard that one? I know that I have-as a parent and an educator. A sense of fairness and justice is something that develops in children at a young age and stays with them throughout their lives. When they are very young, what is fair is often dependent on what the child wants. As they grow older, children start to develop a more sophisticated, nuanced way of understanding fairness. And some of the way in which they evaluate the righteousness of a situation is through the lens of culture. The following article explains how children develop a sense of fairness. It appears that some aspects of fairness are universal while others depend on where a child is raised. For more information about what fairness actually looks like in the brain and what regions are activated during a game regarding fairness, check out this article. This series will be ongoing. There may not be a post every week, but we'll keep it going for as long as people have questions that need to be answered! Leave a comment below, fill out the interest survey, or contact me. What questions do you have about diversity and the brain? What would you like to know more about? How does this all relate to your children? I can't wait to hear from you! Did you enjoy this post? Sign up for our newsletter! Instead of having to remember to check out the blog, you will get great information delivered right to your email. Tips, strategies, articles, and videos so you don't have to figure it all out yourself! When you sign up, you will receive a useful book list for kids of all ages-babies to teens. Enjoy and let us know what you think!
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If you Google "Family Pictures", lots of beautiful images pop up. The families are smiling, there are usually 2 or 3 children in them (and usually one boy and one girl). Everyone is dressed in lovely bright colors-at least one person is wearing a polo shirt. And another thing to notice is that the families tend to be homogeneous. This is not to say that they are all White-in fact, the first family that popped up when I Googled this was Asian-but they tend to all be the same race. They also tend to be one daddy and one mommy. Everyone once in awhile a grandparent, or two, is thrown in there (not literally, but you get the idea) and they are also the same race as the rest of the family. I scrolled down for so long, I gave up before I found another interracial couple (except for Modern Family stills), a gay couple (except for Modern Family promos), or any other type of family.
This made me realize something. First of all, thank goodness for Modern Family! Their portrayal of families is truly fantastic. I think that they help expand the idea of what constitutes a family-at least according to Google. But more importantly, is this really the only way that we think of families nowadays? There are so many different types of families today and I think it's important that we celebrate them all. Family is not defined by a husband and wife-not by a man and a woman for that matter. Family, in my opinion, is defined by love and caring. I get asked sometimes what the difference between family and friends are. My answer is always that family is permenant. So think about the people in your life who are permanant; the people who are not going away. Those are your family. I'd love to have you all brainstorm some non-traditional families that you can think of. I will name a few to get people started, but I know that I will fall short of thinking of them all. Then talk to your child(ren) about family and what it really means. And allow your child to come up with some examples of non-traditional families that they know of that fit into the following categories or others that you may think of. It is a great way to help them expand their thinking and challenge the traditional.
Please comment below with additional suggestions. This is clearly not an exhaustive list, but wouldn't it be great if we could generate an enormously long list? One that really challenges those Google photos and allows people to define family in the way that they see fit. I'm looking forward to seeing your responses! Did you enjoy this post? Sign up for our newsletter! Instead of having to remember to check out the blog, you will get great information delivered right to your email. Tips, strategies, articles, and videos so you don't have to figure it all out yourself! When you sign up, you will receive a useful book list for kids of all ages-babies to teens. Enjoy and let us know what you think! I'm just going to leave this here. Feel free to comment away. I love looking at brain development through a cultural lens. So much of what we think is innate or automatic is actually culturally dependent or is highly influenced by culture. The following article talks about the influence of culture on mirror neurons. Mirror neurons are pathways in the brain that help you to learn from someone else's actions. For example, if you watch someone shooting a basketball, mirror neurons are helping you to learn how to perfect your jump shot even without physically practicing it. The same neurons fire when you are shooting the ball. Mirror neurons also fire for other actions such as gestures and expressions. Many neuroscientists believe that these neurons are the basis for empathy in the brain.
However, not all actions are created equally when it comes to mirror neurons. As the article points out, it depends who performs the action as to how the neurons fire in the brain. If you perceive the person performing the action to be someone who shares your culture, then there is a higher level of mirror neuron activity. So if neuroscientists are correct, this essentially means that we empathize more with someone of our own culture. I would argue that it is also true that we learn better from someone of the same culture. So what does this mean for children? Well, what if your child has a teacher that does not look like him or her; that is not of the same culture? Does that mean that your child will have a harder time learning from them? What about learning from peers? If a peer of a different culture does something really well, is it less likely that your child will learn from their actions? I am not sure that anyone has the answers to these questions yet, but they are important ones to ask. So what can you as a parent do? Help your child to see the similarities between themselves and others and not just the differences. It appears that the more we identify with someone, the more we can empathize with them, and (I would argue) the more we can learn from them. You do not have to say that everyone in your child's life is the same-that would be disingenuous. But you can talk about what unique things you share in common. A common family set-up, a common interest, a common background, a common language or dialect. Help your child to see that we are all diverse and different. And that is part of what binds us together. http://www.sciencedaily.com/releases/2007/07/070718002115.htm This series will be ongoing. There may not be a post every week, but we'll keep it going for as long as people have questions that need to be answered! Leave a comment below, fill out the interest survey, or contact me. What questions do you have about diversity and the brain? What would you like to know more about? How does this all relate to your children? I can't wait to hear from you! Did you enjoy this post? Sign up for our newsletter! Instead of having to remember to check out the blog, you will get great information delivered right to your email. Tips, strategies, articles, and videos so you don't have to figure it all out yourself! When you sign up, you will receive a useful book list for kids of all ages-babies to teens. Enjoy and let us know what you think! I had fully intended to write a post about diversity and neuroscience this week. In my last blog post, I had introduced the topic and was excited to get a few posts out about it. But then Barbie came out with several new dolls and let's face it, they are everywhere! And people have very strong opinions.
I have read some articles that think the new dolls are a triumph. Thank goodness Barbie is now recognizing that women have curves, different color skin, and curly (not those gentle blonde waves cascading down Barbie's back, but something with actual texture) hair. Others are a bit more skeptical, saying that giving girls "curvy Barbie" will only make these girls feel bad about themselves. Still others are saying that no matter what Barbie does, they are not comfortable with the message that it portrays to young girls. So what is a parent to do when their child is asking...begging...for one of the new Barbies?
For more tips about talking to kids about race and diversity, see my posts for babies, toddlers, and school-aged kids. And don't forget to take our survey so we can find out more about what you want to read and hear on Culturally Competent Kids! I am absolutely fascinated with neuroscience, which is the science of the brain. I have to admit that when I was an undergraduate, I was terrified of the brain. It all seemed so complicated and convoluted to me. I completely avoided the topic even though I knew that I wanted to be a psychologist (and psychologists need to understand the brain-at least a little bit!). In graduate school, I was able to embrace the study of the brain and I have been slightly obsessed ever since. I really believe that it helps us understand ourselves and others so much better than simply describing behavior alone.
So, I decided to start this series to "explain the brain" and how it relates to diversity. I know, those two topics do not seem very connected at all, but they are! Our brain development is significantly shaped by our environment and diversity, or lack thereof, can significantly influence our environment. How does your brain develop if you speak more than one language? How does exposure to peers with different socioeconomic statuses influence the brain? Does learning about different religions change your brain? Using research and my own experience and knowledge, I hope to answer some of these questions in an informative and accessible way. As we go along in this series, I would love to hear from you. What questions do you have about diversity and the brain? What would you like to know more about? How does this all relate to your children? Not sure where or how to start? Check out some of the other blog posts and resources for inspiration. I may not be able to answer every question; the answer may not be fully understood yet! But I will try to offer some information to mull over and hopefully look at things in a new way. This series will be ongoing. There may not be a post every week, but we'll keep it going for as long as people have questions that need to be answered! Leave a comment below, fill out the interest survey, or contact me. I can't wait to hear from you! Did you enjoy this post? Sign up for our newsletter! Instead of having to remember to check out the blog, you will get great information delivered right to your email. Tips, strategies, articles, and videos so you don't have to figure it all out yourself! When you sign up, you will receive a useful book list for kids of all ages-babies to teens. Enjoy and let us know what you think! For those of you who are not in Northeast USA, ignoring the news, or just refusing to look outside, we have a blizzard on our hands here in Washington, DC. It has been incredible--over 36 hours of snowfall and over 2 feet on the ground. Some of us are fine with just staying inside for the next week and a half and some of us need...to...get...out...of...the...house! Driving anywhere isn't an option and even walking is a struggle so your immediate community, your neighbors, are your lifeline.
I love this article because so often when I hear talk of immigrant communities, I hear derogatory and insulting statements about why they cannot acclimate to their adopted country or that they only spend time with people from their home country. I think people so often fail to recognize the importance of community. In a blizzard like this, it becomes incredibly obvious why community is important, but it is important all of the time. Life is not easy and having people around you who genuinely care about you is essential. It is often difficult for many immigrant families to find community outside of people from their home country, because let's face it, Americans aren't always super welcoming. (Need proof?) So think about your own community and how you would fare without them. Then read the article and put yourself in their shoes. How would these people get along without the community that they created? Could that sense of community have been recreated with others? How welcoming would you have been if these families moved into your neighborhood? In a previous blog post, I talked about getting adolescents to talk about race. This is a great article to use to start a conversation. It will be interesting to hear their perspective. Did you enjoy this post? Sign up for our newsletter! Instead of having to remember to check out the blog, you will get great information delivered right to your email. Tips, strategies, articles, and videos so you don't have to figure it all out yourself! When you sign up, you will receive a useful book list for kids of all ages-babies to teens. Enjoy and let us know what you think! This is the final installment of this series. Even if you have a teen at home or a young adult who is no longer at home, check out some of the previous blogs on this topic as well. Even some of the suggestions in the babies section will be applicable to you and your child. You should check the toddlers/preschoolers and school-aged kids posts as well. And if you are still not sure why it is important to talk about this stuff, find out why here and here. Leave a comment and let me know what you thought of the series. Enjoy!
Teenagers/Young Adults: I included young adult in here because once your kids are adults, they will encounter a whole other set of issues regarding race that they may have been shielded from when they were living at home. Don't stop the conversation when your kids leave the house! The brain continues to develop until a child is about 26 so even in their early 20s, they are still trying to make sense of the world. So keep it going well into adulthood.
This is the end of our series. But don't worry, there is more! If you enjoyed it and want weekly inspiration and empowerment for having these conversations and so much more, sign up for our newsletter. Instead of having to remember to check out the blog, you will get great information delivered right to your email. Tips, strategies, articles, and videos so you don't have to figure it all out yourself! When you sign up, you will receive a useful book list that will allow you to put in place one of the first suggestions from this series. Don't forget to leave a comment and contact us if you have questions or you want Dr. Sweeney speak to your group. Welcome back! We are more than halfway through this series. I hope that you are enjoying it so far. Remember, this post builds upon the previous one. In addition to the suggestions listed below, check out the posts for Toddlers and Preschoolers and Babies (yes, babies!). Incorporate as many suggestions as you can. As you go along, you will see just how much these interventions all interact with and contribute to one another. Enjoy!
School-Aged Kids: This is a time of significant cognitive development for kids. Children are now much more logical and linear in their thought process. Their thoughts are not as egocentric, meaning they are able to see how events affect other people and not just them directly. Children can also see how different events are connected and contribute to one another. This cognitive development mirrors their linguistic development, meaning that children are actually able to have conversations about the things that they observe. Therefore, this is a great time to start having real conversations with kids about race. They can actually talk about what they see and hear. Be careful to tailor your language to an age-appropriate level, but do not water down your conversations. Be direct, open, and honest.
Remember that this list builds from the last one. Many of the suggestions in the Toddlers & Preschoolers post are applicable to School-Aged Kids so check it out and apply some of your favorites. Do you have other ideas? Post them in the comments below! And don't forget to sign up for our newsletter! Check back in a few days for tips on kids who hardly seem like they are kids anymore: Teenagers. Welcome back! This is a continuation from my last post about talking to babies about race. Well, not really talking--it was more about exposing them to it. If you missed the last post in the series, check it out here. Anyway, in addition to the suggestions for the babies, there are some great ways to talk to toddlers about race. Toddler's minds and vocabularies are growing at an incredible rate. They are verbalizing quite a bit more, but they are still not ready to have full-blown conversations about race. So the idea is to take things a step beyond simple exposure and lay the foundation for talks that you want to happen later. Here are some ideas:
Toddlers/Preschoolers: This is the time when kids are starting to talk. They are not ready to have intense conversations about race, but the topic can be introduced to them more directly now.
Remember that this list builds from the last one. Many of the suggestions in the Babies post are applicable to Toddlers and Preschoolers so check it out and apply some of your favorites. Do you have other ideas? Post them in the comments below! And don't forget to sign up for our newsletter! Check back in a few days for tips for a slightly older set of kids: School-Aged Kids. |
AuthorDr. Sweeney is a licensed school psychologist and cultural competence expert. Here are her musings on life in a multicultural world. Archives
February 2017
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